SOMETIMES IT HURTS TO OBEY

It sure is hard to obey God's Word at times when you know you may hurt someone you deeply care about. How horrible to try to help them "grow in the Lord" and be more successful in achieving their deepest heart's desire to serve God effectively, only to possibly drive them away from Him and the church and yourself. It hurts when you have read the scriptures, prayed about it, and felt the spirit urging you to talk to that fellow brother or sister in the Lord, only to have them respond totally opposite of how you thought they would respond. Yes, I know it does hurt, and it is so hard to humble ourselves to accept "constructive criticism from others. I've "been there, done that". I have been on the receiving end, more times than I wish to say. But I am glad someone cared enough to invest in me.

Shouldn't a mature Christian be able to pray through it and grow from it? I love John Maxwell's book, "Failing Forward". He states that failure is inevitable. It is not a question of IF we will fail, but how we will react to our failures or shortcomings. We need to use those failures to improve ourselves. H. Stanley Judd said, "Don't waste energy trying to cover up failure. Learn from your failures and go on to the next challenge. It's okay to fail. If you're not failing, you're not growing." Hyatt and Gottlieb assert, "Most careers involve other people. You can have great academic intelligence and still lack social intelligence - the ability to be a good listener, to be sensitive toward others, to give and take critcism well." So, when you try to help one you love in the Lord by opening their eyes to a possible shortcoming, and they react totally opposite of what you expect, is it their "lack of social intelligence" or your own "lack of social intelligence" that presented the inability to "give" or "take" criticism? Then you question yourself if you should have said what you said. Then the spirit reminds you of the instructions you felt you had received in God's Word... Oy-Vey!

The scriptures tell us: "Preach the Word; be prepared in season and out of season; correct, rebuke, encourage - with great patience and careful instruction."(2 Timothy 4:2) and "Remind the people to be subject to rulers and authorities, to be obedient, to be ready to do whatever is good, to slander no one, to be peaceable and considerate, and to show true humility toward all men." (Titus 3:1). There are many more scriptures that instruct us on how we need to act and react, to live and to lead, to exhort fellow believers in the Lord and in love to constantly seek to grow to be more like Jesus. I doubt that man can reach perfection on this earth, but we must constantly seek to let the spirit lead us to help us grow "in His image".

I take these scriptures as commands. I would not want to live my life thinking I was reflecting Jesus well in all situations if, indeed, I was not. I would hope a fellow Christian brother or sister would let me know (in a kind, gentle way) if I was offending others in any way, including themselves. "Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others." (Philippians 2:3-4) I realize it is important to first build a good relationship with a fellow Christian before trying to help them see an area where they may be "coming across" totally differently than how they think they are in relating to others. The problem is, how do you know for sure that the closeness you feel to that person is how they also feel to you? How do you know they have truly come to the point of Christian maturity you they need to be (and you think they are) to be ready and able to accept your insights?

Yes, it hurts to obey God's Word sometimes, especially in trying to meet the responsibilities of being a "fellow Christian". Can we shun this responsibility and make it to Heaven? It sure would be easier to just worry about yourself making it to Heaven. I guess we just have to keep on doing our best to "trust and obey", no matter what the cost. I'm glad someone took the time to enlighten me on some of my shortcomings in the past and I hope I have a close enough relationship with others that they feel they can do it in the future if needed. I just want so much to be like Jesus!

I need to be patient with those who do not act or react as Jesus would, remember we are human, and ask God to intervene and use me in any way He wishes to use me to help others ... no matter what the cost may be. If I truly love them in the Lord and want them to have joy and success in their efforts to grow in the Lord and serve Him, I can do no less. At least I won't have to worry about getting to Heaven and having them look at me with eyes of betrayal and ask me why I never told them.